honey badger don't give a shit. (galbadia) wrote in lolplotholes,
honey badger don't give a shit.

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MOAR TIME SHIT because it is driving me crazy

I SWEAR TO GOD, the only concern the developers had was that damn ~*~*LOVE STORY*~*~ and it's like they left their ability to work on details at the door.

Alright, so! Say the game begins in the year 2007. It's said the Sorceress War begins 18 years prior to the start of the game, making it 1989. Well, looking at this page, that kind of makes sense. Here's a list of some important events.


  • Sorceress War begins
  • Galbadia takes over Timber; rebel factions form
  • Laguna meets Julia
  • Laguna and his crew to to Centra; escape
  • FH is established by former Estharians

  • Julia writes/records/releases "Eyes On Me"
  • Julia marries Caraway; has Rinoa
  • Adel goes looking for kids; Ellone's parents are killed
  • Laguna is all up in Winhill; marries Raine; knocks her up
  • Ellone is captured
  • Laguna makes it to Esthar and rescues her
  • Laguna sends Ellone back to Winhill, becomes president, war ends
  • Squall is born

However! FUCK, if you do the math and pay attention to details and shit, you'd see that there's no way Squall would be able to be born in 1990 and be 17 by the start of the game like they say. He would turn 17 in 2007, but not be that age by his SeeD exam. WHICH, according to his study panel, is given in the spring; Squall's birthday is right at the tail end of summer. He would have had to have been born in 1989 for this to work, AUGHGHFK.

Rinoa is 17 by the start of the game, probably just having turned 17 considering her birthday is March 3 and that fucking field exam occurs in the spring (AKA MARCH-MAY, DUH). Her being born in 1990 is right on target; in fact, that's what I have as her year of birth on the timeline for TtP.

fuck, I'm one headache away from declaring my timeline canon. >:|

Tags: are you fucking kidding me, bitch what, come on now, do they know the meaning of details?, elena thinks too much y/y?, freaking seriously, hello pay attention to the details, how is this possible, i'm about to call my timeline canon, less focus on the "love story" damnit, maybe ultimecia fucked with the time, more focus on details, square likes to create headaches, such cockery this is, that is so illogical wtf, this cannot possibly be canon, time inconsistencies, what is the meaning of this, what is this shit, what the fuck
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